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I write verbose posts about polyamory, love, lust, and self-discovery on my other blog Victoria's Imaginarium.

Wednesday, August 28, 2013

Give me your money

Just a rant post, you can click away now. Thank you bye.

These few days I'm sulking over the fact that I was not born rich for the first time in my life, so please don't lecture me on how I should be grateful of what I have and give me examples of how in the poorest parts of the world kids are starving and dying everyday. Most of the time I don't think about money, like, I know I'm richer than many poor people (and poorer than many rich people), but I don't really think about money much, and don't really watch how much I spend (although I always choose the cheaper things), because I don't usually spend a lot of money anyway, except on food. And on clothes, but I'm calculative when I'm shopping, hence my hauls actually carry more monetary value than the amount I paid, so it's okay. Anyways— 

I was just thinking, if I was born rich, I could have achieved much more than I already achieved today. I could have had an exhibition of my artwork, gotten interviewed on radio stations, published some books, gotten featured on newspapers, etc. Right, first of all you need to have talents and dedication bla bla bla, right. But guess what, I know someone who is younger than me, not particularly talented but has already achieved half of what I just listed—oh maybe she's just lucky—right, she IS indeed lucky, because she was born filthy rich, and all those can be achieved so easily even if you have zero talent.

I have talents. And passion.

Yet I haven't achieved any success that is big enough for me to feel proud of myself and my life.
(no I don't consider getting sponsored to study for a Bachelor degree in the US as a remarkable success)

Because I don't have the time to work for those achievements. I don't have the time because I have to use my most of my time to study to maintain good results to secure my current and future scholarships for tertiary education (and use the remaining time to de-stress). I have to get scholarships because I wasn't born rich, yet I'm so stuck-up and ambitious that I swear to myself I'm not gonna settle with anything less than a PhD, and the 'yet...' will not be there had I been born rich. To all those who say money can't buy you true success and true happiness, fuck you, what do you mean by 'true success', 'true happiness', success is success and happiness is happiness, you simply don't know what you are saying because you have never been rich and have never experienced what money can do for you. Sour grapes.

My goal in life is not to become filthy rich (although that would be nice and I wouldn't oppose the idea) and I'm always glad that I'm not spoiled because I wasn't born rich, but you see, I want comfort, and I want success, I want my family to live a carefree life, I want to help people who are disenfranchised in poverty, and everything would have been much easier if a one-billion-dollar check falls from the sky into my pocket, right now.

Indigo children like me should grow up poor and then become rich at 20's.


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