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I write verbose posts about polyamory, love, lust, and self-discovery on my other blog Victoria's Imaginarium.

Friday, August 23, 2013

Are you an introvert too?

Just sharing with you an article from Huffington post (plus doing a self-assessment). If you're pretty sure you're an extrovert, you can click away now.
(I suppose most extroverts are not interested in getting to understand or making friends with introverts...)

Highlighted phrases are descriptions I find very true for me, grey words in brackets are my commentary.


Placing an irrelevant collage of selfies taken 3 years ago here because 我高兴.


23 Signs You're Secretly An Introvert


People are frequently unaware that they’re introverts -– especially if they’re not shy -- because they may not realize that being an introvert is about more than just cultivating time alone. Instead, it can be more instructive to pay attention to whether they're losing or gaining energy from being around others, even if the company of friends gives them pleasure.


1. You find small talk incredibly cumbersome.



Introverts are notoriously small talk-phobic, as they find idle chatter to be a source of anxiety, or at least annoyance. For many quiet types, chitchat can feel disingenuous

(I either find excuses to terminate it or have it escalate quick to deeper topics, depending on my mood or how much I want to get to know a person.)


2. You go to parties – but not to meet people.

If you're an introvert, you may sometimes enjoy going to parties, but chances are, you're not going because you're excited to meet new people. At a party, most introverts would rather spend time with people they already know and feel comfortable around. If you happen to meet a new person that you connect with, great – but meeting people is rarely the goal.

(unless the party is full of charming or intelligent people... which is rarely the case.)


3. You often feel alone in a crowd.



Ever feel like an outsider in the middle of social gatherings and group activities, even with people you know? "If you tend to find yourself feeling alone in a crowd, you might be an introvert," says Dembling. "We might let friends or activities pick us, rather than extending our own invitations."


4. Networking makes you feel like a phony.

Networking (read: small-talk with the end goal of advancing your career) can feel particularly disingenuous for introverts, who crave authenticity in their interactions.



5. You've been called "too intense."



Do you have a penchant for philosophical conversations and a love of thought-provoking books and movies? If so, you're a textbook introvert. "Introverts like to jump into the deep end," says Dembling.

(I'm known to have the ability to turn almost everything philosophical... for books and movies, unless very entertaining, I find non-thought-provoking ones a waste of time.)


6. You're easily distracted.

While extroverts tend to get bored easily when they don't have enough to do, introverts have the opposite problem  they get easily distracted and overwhelmed in environments with an excess of stimulation.

(I always suspect that I have Attention Deficiency Disorder... it's almost impossible for me to stay focuses on one task.)


7. Downtime doesn’t feel unproductive to you.



One of the most fundamental characteristics of introverts is that they need time alone to recharge their batteries. Whereas an extrovert might get bored or antsy spending a day at home alone with tea and a stack of magazines, this sort of down time feels necessary and satisfying to an introvert.


8. Giving a talk in front of 500 people is less stressful than having to mingle with those people afterwards.

Introverts can be excellent leaders and public speakers  and although they're stereotyped as being the shrinking violet, they don't necessarily shy away from the spotlight. Performers like Lady Gaga, Christina Aguilera and Emma Watson all identify as introverts, and an estimated 40 percent of CEOs have introverted personalities. Instead, an introvert might struggle more with meeting and greeting large groups of people on an individual basis.

(true, I find public speaking/ performing in public less energy-consuming and more enjoyable)


9. When you get on the subway, you sit at the end of the bench – not in the middle.

Whenever possible, introverts tend to avoid being surrounded by people on all sides. "We're likely to sit in places where we can get away when we're ready to  easily," says Dembling. "When I go to the theater, I want the aisle seat or the back seat."

(Kinda, but I always want the middle seat at the back row when I go to the theater... better view.)


10. You start to shut down after you’ve been active for too long.

Do you start to get tired and unresponsive after you've been out and about for too long? It's likely because you’re trying to conserve energy. Everything introverts do in the outside world causes them to expend energy, after which they'll need to go back and replenish their stores in a quiet environment, says Dembling. Short of a quiet place to go, many introverts will resort to zoning out.

(not quite sure if I tend to zone out, but I simply can't be productive if I haven't had enough alone time after coming back from outside)


11. You're in a relationship with an extrovert.



It's true that opposites attract, and introverts frequently gravitate towards outgoing extroverts who encourage them to have fun and not take themselves too seriously. "Introverts are sometimes drawn to extroverts because they like being able to ride their 'fun bubble,'" Dembling says.

(I actually feel stressed or even irritated when wsk pushes me! Let me take my own pace please.) 


12. You'd rather be an expert at one thing than try to do everything.

The dominant brain pathways introverts use is one that allows you to focus and think about things for a while, so they’re geared toward intense study and developing expertise, according to Olsen Laney.

(I think I'm more like... multi-talented but never too good in any -_- )


13. You actively avoid any shows that might involve audience participation.

Because really, is anything more terrifying?

(not really, I quite like attention :D)


14. You screen all your calls -- even from friends.



You may not pick up your phone even from people you like, but you’ll call them back as soon as you’re mentally prepared and have gathered the energy for the conversation. "To me, a ringing phone is like having somebody jump out of a closet and go 'BOO!,'" says Dembling. "I do like having a long, nice phone call with a friend  as long as it's not jumping out of the sky at me."

(this explained why I can go months not catching up with my close friends.)


15. You notice details that others don't.

The upside of being overwhelmed by too much stimuli is that introverts often have a keen eye for detail, noticing things that may escape others around them. Research has found that introverts exhibit increased brain activity when processing visual information, as compared to extroverts.

(I am so observant I can read people's minds. Really.)


16. You have a constantly running inner monologue.



“Extroverts don’t have the same internal talking as we do,” says Olsen Laney. “Most introverts need to think first and talk later."

(not necessarily inner... wtf.)


17. You have low blood pressure.

A 2006 Japanese study found that introverts tend to have lower blood pressure than their extroverted counterparts.

(what sorcery is this. I'm lazy to read the study so I dunno the logic behind it but my blood pressure is 80/60 wtf.)


18. You’ve been called an “old soul” – since your 20s.



Introverts observe and take in a lot of information, and they think before they speak, leading them to appear wise to others. "Introverts tend to think hard and be analytical," says Dembling. "That can make them seem wise"

(I have school teachers telling me I have an old soul since I was 12. My friends constantly said I'm a 50-year-old soul habituating in a young body. But I disagree with the phrase "That can make them seem wise"— I am wise! lol wtf.)


19. You don't feel "high" from your surroundings

Neurochemically speaking, things like huge parties just aren’t your thing. Extroverts and introverts differ significantly in how their brains process experiences through "reward" centers. Researchers demonstrated this phenomenon by giving Ritalin  the ADHD drug that stimulates dopamine production in the brain  to introverted and extroverted college students. They found that extroverts were more likely to associate the feeling of euphoria achieved by the rush of dopamine with the environment they were in. Introverts, by contrast, did not connect the feeling of reward to their surroundings. The study "suggests that introverts have a fundamental difference in how strongly they process rewards from their environment, with the brains of introverts weighing internal cues more strongly than external motivational and reward cues," explained LiveScience's Tia Ghose.

(I do like big parties! especially those thrown at clubs or street festivals.)


20. You look at the big picture.

When describing the way that introverts think, Jung explained that they're more interested in ideas and the big picture rather than facts and details. Of course, many introverts excel in detail-oriented tasks  but they often have a mind for more abstract concepts as well. "Introverts do really enjoy abstract discussion," says Dembling.

(not sure about this, I'm very perfectionist over small details too.)


21. You’ve been told to “come out of your shell.”



Many introverted children come to believe that there's something "wrong" with them if they're naturally less outspoken and assertive than their peers. Introverted adults often say that as children, they were told to come out of their shells or participate more in class.

(I grew up as one of the most outspoken and assertive kids in class. *shrug*)

22. You’re a writer.

Introverts are often better at communicating in writing than in person, and many are drawn to the solitary, creative profession of writing. Most introverts – like "Harry Potter" author J.K. Rowling – say that they feel most creatively charged when they have time to be alone with their thoughts.

(I think my skills of communicating in person are now as good as in writing, but yes, it's almost impossible for me to write or study if I frequently see other human in my environment.)


23. You alternate between phases of work and solitude, and periods of social activity.

Introverts can move around their introverted “set point” which determines how they need to balance solitude with social activity. But when they move too much  possibly by over-exerting themselves with too much socializing and busyness  they get stressed and need to come back to themselves, according Olsen Laney. This may manifest as going through periods of heightened social activity, and then balancing it out with a period of inwardness and solitude. 



Placing another irrelevant collage of old selfies here because... why not.




Unrelated note: 

Simisai. I blogged about my visit to UW-Madison Geology Museum two months ago in a post titled Dinosaurs, fossils and rocks. I accidentally (?) published the post before completing it, and all this while I didn't realize that I in fact only completed the dinosaur part wtf. Anyway I'm guessing you'll agree with me that the photos of fossils and rocks I just added to that post were even more boring than the dinosaur bones. Unless you're very into geology or feeling too bored right now. 

Um... Bye.


1 comment:

  1. I'm an introvert, but I would like to bring you out of your shell (or crawl inside of it)....haha

    ReplyDelete