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I write verbose posts about polyamory, love, lust, and self-discovery on my other blog Victoria's Imaginarium.

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Today my poop is green

Since Disgusting Me and Molting Toes failed to gross my readers out (yes you), I have decided to take it to another level.

I just pooped green feces.

Exam terror? Overload of delusional philosophy texts? Blame Epictetus and Descrates!!! Epictetus is still okay, super okay actually, although not coherent with my life philosophy, at least what he says is comprehensible. Descrates can go die (well he is already dead anyway), what the fuck is that language in Meditation on First Philosophy?!! @#$%

And my mid-term tomorrow is about these two books fml.

The previous take-home exam, I couldn't even figure out what the fuck the questions were about without asking someone with good English. Scored 87 and it's a fucking B. Screw you curved grading!!!!! And why my angmoh classmates so genius?! How much did they score actually to make my 87 a Beeeee?! @#$%

Never mind, tomorrow I'll write a fantastic paper, so fantastic that Descartes will climb out of his coffin to thank me for pointing out the flaws in his work and I will invite him to host a Halloween party at my house.



Back to the topic.

Actually the title itself has said it all, but it's still better to warn you once again before you look at my awesomely disgusting pictures:




Warning!

DO NOT scroll down if you are
-going to eat/drink soon
-eating/drinking
-suffering from a weak stomach which initiates cramp when you see awful scenes
-suffering from phobia to disgusting things
-gifted with strong memory, esp on pictures
-an admirer of mine, or my blog
-whatever conditions that fit
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ANY harm caused is not my responsible because I have warned you.
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Please do not judge me by my poops.
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I hope you're eating/about to eat and get mindfucked.
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See? I have warned you! The picture quality damn good right? :D


To compensate your loss of appetite, here is the scientific explanation:
The liver constantly secretes a bright green fluid called bile into the small intestine or it is stored in the gallbladder.

Bile is needed to absorb fats and fat soluble vitamins. It also helps to soften stools and is responsible for giving stools their characteristic brown color.

As bile makes its way through the intestines, it progressively changes color from green to yellow to brown, due to the action of bacteria in the large intestine on the bile salts.

Green stool often indicates that food has passed through the intestines faster than normal (called decreased bowel transit time), before it could be changed from green to brown.

Diarrhea decreases bowel transit time, so any condition that causes diarrhea can result in green stool.

Source: Yahoo answer


But I was not having diarrhea, you can see that the poop was very solid and soft. Nice texture.

So who is the culprit?


The flesh was actually pretty, not rotten at all. It's just that I ate too many in 1 day so......

But I like it!!! :D Usually poops are brown or black, so boring okay?! Show me some other colors please!

Can I have glittery pink next time? :D

Bye bye, I have to bond with Descartes now. Wish me luck.




12 comments:

  1. you use so little tissue ah when you shit. also, why is one ketul brown and everything else lumpy green? I request a follow up to these questions! :P

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  2. I'm partly joking btw. but partly serious too. lol.

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  3. I second Darren's question. Explanation needed. Did you cheat? Pooping also want to cheat ah put fake shit inside

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  4. under closer examination, I observed that the harder brown ketul transitioned into the lumpy green texture.

    I still don't get how you can use so little tissue when you poop. we demand answers!

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  5. 1. I realized the color was awesome after the first wiping, I knew I was gonna take picture of it so I temporarily disposed tissue papers used for second wiping into trash bin.

    2. The brown lump was the left over of previous defecation.

    3. There is no way I could find fake green poop, even if I did why would I want to contaminate the fake poop with my real poop? It would make more sense if you suspect that I PS-ed them, but no, if PS i'll make them pink instead wakakakka.

    Conclusion: My hygiene habit is good and the pictures are real. Thank you for your support hahahaha

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  6. Epitectus: Green poop interferes with your bowel, not with your faculty of choice. Continue studying... THIS IS SPARTAAAAA!

    xD

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  7. omg what do you mean previous defecation! you mean the last person didn't flush or what!

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  8. MY previous defecation. meaning i didn't poop all brown poops out when i last defecated. lololol

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  9. Lol, if you would eat me, I would end up as the Hulk :-D

    ReplyDelete