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I write verbose posts about polyamory, love, lust, and self-discovery on my other blog Victoria's Imaginarium.

Saturday, July 31, 2010

Nails art... PS-ed one


Not having my nails painted like the 1st picture above mainly because:
1. No enough time (either to DIY or go to professional)
2. No enough care--I believe I'll drop those little cute things glued on my nails, scratch the design or more intense, break the nails
3. No enough discipline--confirmed, self-obsession will draw my attention from studies or conversations to the nails
4. No enough guts--I think the earlier-years education from my family sorta mentally restrain me on how a student is supposed to look, even though I'm already in college. Another reason for not coloring my hair. Yeah my dressing style does differ from most students, I like dress and legging and feminine wear rather than T-shirt and jeans, but if you realize I usually go for plain and simple style. So my nails better suits my clothes :P

So I'm sticking to this nude color, for now!

TheFaceShop, the brand I'm using currently. A gift from Anna ♥

Actually those reasons above were crapped to make this post longer lol! I do love to have my nails painted with cool design, just not yet strongly driven to get it done~

Going back to college this afternoon. 4th sem here I come!

Thursday, July 29, 2010

Childhood years

Last midnight, I was creating an album for pictures of these places related closely to me. When it came to the title, first thought on mind--'The place where I grew up', but then my fingers paused, in the end I changed it to just 'Home'. Think back of it now, the phrase actually DOES make sense, and I did not make it the title just because it isn't the place I first stayed in?

If I were to count I stayed here even longer than my 1st home, 10 years (and still adding) vs 9 years. Sometimes it's funny how we human are so tangled with childhood memories :)

I was born in Asia Clinic, Melaka but my hometown is Segamat, Johor. Well, apparently my parents and grandparents* thought that obstetrician in Malacca was more professional, and handing the birth of me to a trustworthy clinic was essential to ensure my safety, good look, future talents and intelligence. HAHAHAHAHA

*from my mother's side- applies to the rest of this post

Then I stayed and grew up in the 1st home in my life. It was a single-story shophouse in Pekan Jabi, Segamat. The whole row of shophouses on that street was wooden, I could hear every conversation of my next door neighbors, or even the arguments happened in the next next door. Living in a wooden house also means living in the fear that white ants would tear down the house one day. The front part of the house was a medicine shop founded by my maternal grandpa (he was a traditional Chinese medicine practitioner) and operated by my aunt; the middle part was 2 linked bedrooms (mine and my parents'); the back part was kitchen and bathroom. Only the floor of the room was covered by carpet, not the woolen type, it was no thicker than a hard book cover; but waterproof. Something like this:

The staircase was how our rooms were linked. Covered by soft carpet because I fell down and hit my head or knees or elbows here so many times. I think I am very blessed, very, because I hit my head almost everywhere and it didn't affect my brain. (er, maybe it did, we never know what would be the case if I never hit my head so many times... alright, I survived all the concussions anyway)

You can see how rotten the wooden part was (eaten by white ants).

My old neighborhood was a semi-village, behind my house there were ducks, gooses, chickens, pigs, dogs, peacocks, ostriches, etc.. There was even a small longkang (drain) INSIDE the back part of my house which provided entrance for centipedes/millipedes, earthworms, cockroaches and mice. About mice, we had 3 cage with spoiled food inside as bait, at least 1 hungry mouse would get trapped every 2 days. I could vividly remember how they screamed when my parents (either one) showered them with boiling water. I caught one bare-handed when I was 8. The little guy was running towards my mom and infant Donut who were napping on the floor, I quickly ran and caught him with hands. I ran outside to the shop and it bit/clawed my small finger. Due to the pain I loosened my grip and my aunt squeked when she saw the mouse rocket out from my palm. Lol

The mouse trap

Oh there was owl(s) too, which tore the wooden bird cage and released a bird I reared since it was an egg T_T bye bye bird, happy getting freedom if you're not eaten yet...

My grandparents were staying just down the street, we went there everyday for meals; which is a reason why my mum can only cook magee up till today, 'cuz grandma is the cook of our meals (which is also why I can't cook, because my mum can't hahaha).

Another kind of floor of my grandparents' house. I think it's cement floor painted green. I also think it was in close contact with the earth, it became damp during rainy days.

My father did not have his own workplace yet that time, he went to work by motorbike. This photo was taken during his lunch break at my grandparent's place.

Pole-dancer in the making...

Model in the making hahaha. Front garden, my grandma has green fingers. Clearly her 2 daughters do not inherit this gene, proven by the number of plants they killed...

Backyard. Tea leaves inside the container. My grandpa was a hardcore tea drinker (he didn't drink plain water). The leaves were plucked from the his tea plants. I was 8 and this was the fattest I had ever gotten in my life!!!!!

Tea plants

Later, my grandpa bought a 3-story house at Segamat Baru. My grandparents brought me to our new house several times before renovations when the indoor air still smelt like cement, and when we talked we would hear the same line twice because of the loud echo. My moved into this new house when I was 9.

After we moved out for a year, the old wooden house where I used to live in was burned down in a fire. Our old neighbors called and told us about it and we quickly drove there. I remember standing across the street with my family members watching our old place engulfed by fire. Our neighbors who ran the traditional grocery shop at the end of the row were trying to save as many things as they could, and then came a Malay youth on motorbike approaching the shop. Before we could stop him, he already ran away on his motorbike with a 50 lb bag of rice he stole from the grocery shop. In Chinese we call this 落井下石 – adding insult to injury as translated by Google.

After the fire, the whole row of wooden shophouses has been rebuilt using brick, hence no longer looks the same. All left are my childhood memories.


Since I was 9½

I saw this almost everyday since I moved here:

I mean the shop, not my mum walking towards it hahaha. This is the entrance of my house. We stay upstairs.

Kedai Ubat Tian Yan. This medicine shop is now operated by my aunt, sometimes my mum.

The wooden drape is to block sunlight, in order to protect the traditional and modern medicine from heat. The plants under it, hmm, I hope they are still alive the next time I come back for holidays... Like I mentioned in next post, my mum and her sister do not inherit my grandma's green fingers. So sad to recall how many plants they have killed:

Oh the 2 lovely cactus plants, blame it on my brother. I think he tried to drown them or maybe he just talked too much to them until they distort themselves.

These are to replace those they killed:
This is one among the 1st generation of plants which survives up till today. I respect you, cactus.

The interior part of the shop:

Quite a lot of people said it looks more like a grocery shop. Hahaha

And the 'Corner of Glory' in the shop:

No we're not selling prizes :P they are my brother and my conquests *proud*

Also, my father's small furniture workplace, located a few rows of buildings away:

Daddy is a carpenter/interior upholsterer. What he does is to go to his customers' houses to do some measurements, goes back and draw several designs of furniture sets, produce the sets chosen and place them in his customers' houses. I am familiar with the smell of wooden pieces, shellac and varnish.

His hobby is to catch and rear birds. Proof:

This is when I was 8. Ugly duckling, I know.

Now I'm 19......
Not the same bird. Now he has 5 of such bird at his workplace. Sorry I dunno what is their name in English, and I'm too lazy to google it. He said he sold one at RM300 last time. The selling point of such birds, they can bow while chirping and open their tails like a peacock. The one in picture has no tail for now because my dad plucked the feathers off, so that it grows a longer tail -__-

Okay now the interior part of my home! :D

Entrance from staircase

TV set

2 of the book shelves

Sofa in the living hall. The main focus is ME not the sofa :P


Staircase to the rooftop. Why needed? Because an owl always stands on our antenna, causing the signals to be unstable when it comes to interesting parts of TV shows. So my dad has to go up there and chase it away.

Yeah, this is the idiotic owl. Difficult to catch its picture, it moves very fast. Description from dad, it is about 1 meter wide when it opens its wings, and it's white like Hedwig.

It has been many years I don't go up the roof since the staircase gets very dirty. Covered in dirt and spider webs. I bloody hate spider like Ronald Weasley, esp those species with long, thin legs. Damn freaky when they grow very big. My hatred is no less for those meaty hairy spiders. There was once a big one climb onto the wall, my dad used a rubber band to hit it, who knows it was a pregnant one and BOOM---thousands of small spiders came out from her broken tummy, extremely gruesome scene, they spread out like a black dot growing into a black wall. My dad killed them with mosquito killer, they stuck on the wall, I dunno how daddy cleaned it because I already ran downstairs.

Eh I dragged away from the topic? I think it somehow means I dunno how to end this post hahaha. So yeah, this is it and I love my home ♥

Crazenne the good girl

Friday, July 23, 2010

I belong with crazy people

For the sake of my safety, I think I better don't type the names out in this post.

Last week, I made a video to bid farewell to my crazy friend who is flying to University Washington as a freshman. Here she is:

In order to remind her of our dinner gang, I inserted some epic pictures of our members into the video:

Our very cute director and her twin dog

Director's psycho partner

The grandparents in our gang, Ah Gong and Ah Ma

Erm...... potential night club dancer?

The homosexual cowboy

insane nerd?

......very patriotic

You know her don't you?

"We are not weird, we are JPA scholars." lol wtf.

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Stop Prejudice!

Prejudice has been accepted for centuries as a normal or even desirable element in a social structure. Take Malaysia as example. It is often that the non-Malays consider the Malays to be in favor of bribery and lazy. Besides, from my own observation and the real experiences of my international friends, people always think Pakistani and Yemeni are all having terrorist mindset, whereas Africans are mostly alcoholic and love to fight.

Not just in terms of race, religion or culture, prejudice can be built on a person’s appearance, academic results, financial status or family background. It refers to the pre-judgment on anyone or anything based on incomplete knowledge or no knowledge at all.

I’ll start by telling you the need to eliminate prejudice.

Prejudice hurts both party which exert and suffer it. As we have prejudice against certain people, we develop hatred and jealousy. We feel guilty but at the same time we reject any piece of truth that might prove us wrong. We become even more dangerous when we try to spread our prejudice. We distort reality and stretch facts just to make our claims stronger. As we do this, we fear if these people get stronger and will one day threaten what we possess or do horrible things to us as a payback. It’s obvious that the first ones we hurt are always ourselves.

On the other hand, when people have prejudice against us, we tend to feel bitter and inferior. We might lose confidence in life or even try to revenge. Unconsciously we will develop prejudice against these people who think bad about us. It becomes a bad cycle.

Prejudice leads to discrimination. Gary Grobman states in his book that women’s capability has not yet been recognized to the same degree as their male counterparts. Women are often excluded from high positions in government, business, and the professions.

Besides, he also points out that people of certain races or nationalities are more likely to be accused of committing crimes. This is not just on the level of mere accusation by the society. It actually causes serious injustice. According to Death Penalty Information Website, the raw data of death sentences in Philadelphia between 1983 and 1993 provide the evidence that race discrimination may be operating. The rate at which eligible black defendants were sentenced to death was nearly 40% higher than the rate for other eligible defendants. Other than that, we can always see on newspaper how prejudice and discrimination drives teenagers to suicide.

Now that you know about the need to eliminate prejudice, let us look at how to do it.

In most situations, prejudice is learned from the elder generation without questioning those biased values. We need to apply critical thinking on this issue. According to Keith Melville’s conference paper in Doctoral Competencies Seminar, we must first admit our prejudice and recognize the lack of our understandings. Next, we must evaluate arguments by examining their logic. Think. Does it make sense? Is there any proof about what we believe? We should refuse to accept at face value of any existing claims that are without supporting evidence. We must examine the credibility of our sources, when we collect information. Finally, when we are forming our conclusion, we should identify logical lapses. Avoid fallacies. The hardest part throughout the whole process is to fight against the habit of rejecting facts contradictory with our long-established beliefs.

You’re probably thinking that this is not an easy task, but let me show you, the elimination of prejudice is possible and can bring benefits. History has shown us the successful removal of global prejudice. Women have always been considered inferior to men over centuries, but nowadays, it is so natural for women gain the right to vote, get education, be employed and own properties. When African-Americans were being oppressed in the United States, who would ever expect one of them to make it to the White House? Today, Barack Obama has become the US president.

As proven in many studies, inequality and discrimination can be effectively reduced with the reduction of prejudice. Due to the success to remove prejudice in many schools, Equality and Human Rights Commission in United Kingdom funded many similar studies, including this report itself. The group being studied was asked to practice critical thinking. As they carry out the process of getting credible information, they open up themselves to people they dislike or fear, and they start to know better and realize that their prejudice was built on unreliable basis. This eventually promotes equality and respect among the students.

Now that my post is coming to an end, I would like to do a small experiment with you.

Once upon a time, there were two boys, A and B.
A’s mother died when he was 9, then his father remarried. His family had never attended any churches. He had only gone through 18 months of formal schooling.
B came from a perfect family. Both his parents were Catholic. When he started schooling at 8, he became the top in class.

I would like you to answer this question quietly in your heart. My question is: Who do you expect to be a successful leader when he grew up?

If you cannot give out an answer because of the lack of information and unsure credibility source of information, congratulation, you have put critical thinking in practice. Guess what? A was Abraham Lincoln while B was Adolf Hitler.

So now you know how prejudice works. It creates psychological burden to both parties; It leads to discrimination, injustice and inequality; It is undesirable.

If the major prejudice against women and African-Americans can be removed, If they managed to remove prejudice in schools in UK, Why can’t we? After all, it is just the pre-judgment based on incomplete knowledge or no knowledge at all.

Regardless of age, gender, race, nationality, appearance, dressing style, family background, academic result, we all want the same thing, that is to be treated equally with respect. If we do not play our parts in eliminating prejudice, one day we might become the victims of it.

Let us make prejudice an unjustified practice in social norms. I believe that we hold the power to eliminate it.

Time for change.

Monday, July 19, 2010

Public Speaking Class

“…because we already went naked in front of each other.” said Cristal, when we wondered why our COM110 class became so united.

HAHA so true!

COM110 is a Public Speaking class which allocates 40% of the total mark on paper-based final examination while 60% on presentations.

Among the 60%,
15% on micro-presentations (from 1½ minutes to 5 minutes)
10% on oral test (2-5 minutes, prepare answers from textbook beforehand)
17.5% on 1 informative speech (5-8 minutes)
17.5% on 1 persuasive speech (8-10 minutes)

We were graded on our eye contact, gestures, vocal variety (pitch, rate, volume), articulation, content and time-control. Not easy I tell you, because we’re encouraged not to memorize word by word, but to know our points and present it. Present, not perform. Thought I could easily score high marks ‘cuz I went on stage so frequently since primary school, from story-telling to speech-giving to poem-reciting to debate and now Model United Nation, I thought it was easy because I can speak spontaneously.

But I was wrong. I could not take care of each aspect graded (as stated above) when I was focusing on delivering the content. Partly because I didn’t really spend time to do preparation as well la. Anyway I was happy there is no quizzes no assignments (except the 2 outlines for informative and persuasive speech, but you don’t really call it assignments) no tests!

Apart from having my final examination screwed up (arghhh blame it to the fog again!!! Read my previous post), taking this class was a fun one :D couldn’t help recalling all those topics I’ve done:

1. In-pair presentation, introduce each other

My partner was Lin Sandar Aye, a Myanmarese (or –rean?), we call her Linda. Something special, Myanmar people do not have surname. Kinda hard to imagine.

Once again the quote ‘never ever judge a book by its cover’ applied when I got to know that she was a volunteer teacher for HIV-infected children and a volunteer helper during a typhoon in her country. This golden-hearted girl is a future obstetrician (specialized doctor for laboring), flying to get her degree in USA soon. Best of luck!

In final presentation she quoted, “The whiter your bread, the faster you’re dead.” Topic? ‘Brown bread is better than white bread’. lol

2. Something or someone who impacted your life greatly

This is Joel Osteen, the senior pastor of Lakewood Church in Texas. According to Wikipedia (hahaha this is what I learn from COM110, we must give credit to the source), Joel Osteen's popularity led to him being featured as one of ABC News "10 Most Fascinating People of 2006", and was named "Most Influential Christian in America" in 2006 by The Church Report.

3. One thing you would like to change about this world

Ignorance. Inspired by Soong Kit's blog post

4. Talk show.

The topic we chose was ‘Permanent mask—Cosmetic surgery’.
Me — the host
Adeline Boey — model
Le Lee — surgeon
We actually dressed up for this talk show. Lee Le put on my lab coat; Adeline, our Miss INTI May 2009 put make-up and dressed like a model. Too bad we didn’t take picture T_T

Le Lee. Active activity organizer in INTI

Adeline Boey, Miss INTI May 2009

5. Debate.

The topic we got was ‘This house believes that marriage is an outdated institution’.
Me, Adeline and Le Lee in 1 team again.
No win or lose 'cuz it was a treated as a speech-giving, but we did a pretty good job.
Proof? Comment from classmates: 'You guys look professional, as if you wanna kill the other side. Very convincing'.

6. Informative speech: Vampire’s Traits based on Human Beliefs

I made my own video, putting in scenes of Twilight and Dracula to show the contrast. Very funny actually, you can just youtube the trailer of Dracula and see the differences. Haha.
Yeah I know these shiny shoes don't look formal, but these are my only flats and I refused to let my feet suffer when I was already having butterflies in my stomach.

7. Persuasive speech

Final presentation, this was a very stressful one. I even spent the whole day to memorize my script word-by-word. When the day came, the atmosphere itself could kill. I started trembling since the moment I went into the classroom.

From left to right: Me, Darren, Cristal, Winnie, YiWey, Chloe, Linda, Serene

But after all, we did our best overcoming the top fear voted--speaking in public! As seen in the picture it was already this late when we finished. 7 something at night.

So after merdeka we all went for dinner and lepak between the hostel blocks for 3 hours plus haha.

This was behind Block Beethoven. The security guard came chase us away, saying that we made too much noise. So after some swearing we 'proceed' to the space between Block Confucius and Block Darwin:
Look at the thing they sat on. We're basically feeding the mosquitoes there, torturing buttcheeks and feet (for them who wore heels). Damn semangat right?

Ahhh how can I forget to mention this guy. Cai Chen from China, his humor was superb. Darren even opened a Facebook group 'The Unofficial Onion Fan Club' for him.

His famous quotes:
1. "May God bless you, my friend."
--after he introduced his partner, Gan Yuan from China by describing how attached he is to his girlfriend. This was his ending line.

2. "No, I want to stand."
--when he was day-dreaming and lecturer threw a question to him, he stood up and Miss Freeman said to him 'you can just sit'. This was his reply.

3. "Dogs are better than cats. Dogs shit one place, cats shit everywhere."
--when we asked for alternatives of his speech topics.

4. Not a quote, but he acted as Edison Chan in talk show. Very... contrasting.

We roflmaoed.

"May God bless you, my friends," esp those who are flying off to USA in short time. Am so gonna miss you all. Have great time there. :)